Wednesday, December 21, 2011

I Hate Michelle Duggar


This is not a vagina.  This is a clown car. 


In light of the fact that Michelle Duggar had a miscarriage recently, I started to scrap this bark.  I figured it would be in poor taste to post my rant under the circumstances.  Then, much to my disgust, Michelle and Jim Bob are taking to the airwaves and cyberworld just to get as much attention (and money) as they can out of this tragedy.  When I saw that, I decided fuck it.  If they can't show the tragedy the respect it deserves, I won't either.  

I hate Michelle Duggar.  I truly hate her.  Guess what?  I hate Jim Bob, too; and I'm not particularly fond of the clowns that climbed out of Michelle's clown car vajayjay.  The whole damn bunch is crazier than an infestation of shit house rats.  Jim Bob and Michelle invoke violent impulses in me.  I'd like to hit them in the face with the sole of my dirtiest shoe - repeatedly.  

Many people are quick to come to the ubergina's defense and proclaim that it's a matter of personal choice.  Yes, it is; but for some reason the airhead sees fit to hold a press conference every time another clown is going to climb out of that car.  When she does that, it is no longer a personal matter.  Don't hold a press conference and then call it a personal matter.  Then there's goofy assed Jim Bob standin' there, cheesin'.  He just stands there looking like a dumbass with that shit eatin' grin on his face.  The two of them are the pure embodiment of almost everything that irks me.

Jim Bob's a politician, and the worst kind.  He's the variety that considers the First Amendment to be there to protect HIS religious freedom, keeping in mind that the practice of his religion includes forcing his beliefs upon the rest of us.  I looked to see if I could find anything about his record in the Arkansas legislature, but all I was able to find was a bunch of bullshit about his breeding capabilities.  I'm sure if I'd looked harder or if I'd have taken a lunch time trip to the Secretary of State's office and pilfered archives, I'd have found citations of just what a shitty politician Jim Bob was.  I'm not that industrious, though.  

I feel bad that Michelle had a miscarriage.  Unfortunately, miscarriage - or spontaneous abortion as it is known medically - is nature's way of correcting something that went wrong.  Mother Nature is a cruel mistress indeed, but when a miscarriage occurs, as a general rule it would be more cruel that the fetus would have survived.  Of course, it's easy for me to sit here and say things like that considering that I've never suffered a miscarriage.  I've been pregnant twice.  I have two children to show for it.  I do know how I felt from the moment of knowing I was pregnant.  Protecting my child became a single-minded obsession.  I know women who have miscarried, and I know women who had to abort in the second and third trimesters lest both they and the baby die.  I have witnessed their heartbreak.  I'm sure it was no easier for the brood mare, or at least I felt that way at first.  Now, I'm not so sure.  I don't criticize them for having a funeral for the baby.  I probably would do the same in their shoes.  I don't criticize them for taking pictures of the baby.  Again, I would probably do the same in their shoes.  I don't even criticize them for giving some of the pictures to close family and friends, as these people might also share in their grief.  My criticism is that Michelle is pimping her dead baby to get herself all of the attention she can possible get.  She's done the interviews, she's released pictures of the baby's hand on her finger, and chances are an episode of their TV show will revolve around this.  TMZ has the pictures of the baby.  I wonder how much the Duggar asswipes were paid for them.  I'm sure Michelle would release them for free just to get the attention and publicity.  

Of course, I figured it was a matter of time before she got pregnant again, considering J child #1 and his wife just had baby #2.  Hell's bells, she couldn't even let J child #1 and his wife enjoy their first child without making herself a part of it all.  See below.  


Really, Michelle?  You couldn't let J child #1 and his wife have a moment?  You had to make it about you?  Why aren't the daughter-in-law's parents here?  I'll tell you why.  They're not attention whores like you, Michelle.  That's why. 

Michelle's probably going to keep it up until she hits menopause or her uterus drops out and runs for the hills screaming like a banshee. The person I really pity in the situation is the oldest daughter.  I'd like to give her a gift.  I'd like to get her a a gross of condoms, a pound of weed, and a full ride scholarship to Cal. State Chico.  If after having a life she chooses to return to Deliverance Country and continue to raise her parents' children, that is her choice.  Right now, she's doing it because she's been brainwashed into believing that it's her choice.  She's also been brainwashed into believing that skydaddy wants her to do it.  She's had no choice, she's had no life.  She's been nothing but her mother's handmaiden.  That's yet another reason I hate Michelle Duggar.  

Ah, well.  I can always hope that the daughters break free from this form of slavery, and I can hope that maybe the sons will be attracted to women who totally reject the whole Quiverful concept.  Unfortunately, if J child #1 is any indication, that ain't gonna happen.  They're all looking for women who were raised just like their sisters have been raised.  I know what you're thinking.  We're not going there today.  Too disturbing. 


Well, in Michelle's case it is.